My name is Vicki and I am a 36 year old single mother to 3 young adult children. I along with my children suffer from a variety of mental illnesses some of which include Bi-Polar, OCD and ADHD. We are survivor's of years of severe physical, mental, emotional and sexual abuse. As a teen I was gang raped by a few boys from the basketball team. That was the beginning of my teen life. I was raped for years while I was a runaway. The cutting and self mutilation started at the age of 13. After all I had gone through, low and behold I was pregnant by the age of 18. When I was 19 I had a set of twins. I thought about giving them up for adoption but I just couldn't. You see I was adopted and it tortured me everyday to think that my mother didn't want me.(It was closed adoption back then.)I have the same father for all my children, he was the choice that started it all. Shortly after I became pregnant he started throwing things at me, then it became fists to the ribs. It just got worse. He tried killing my once. Knife to the throat.I was choked till I passed out more times than I can count.I had enough one day and finally hit him over the head repeatedly with a metal shower bar. Yipee!!
I swore I would make better choices and never put my children through that agian. After I left there father we were on our own just me and my kids. We all lived in apartment for a while but eventually we were evicted. Within the following month of eviction my daughter was molested and we moved from friend to friend 9 times. I finally realized what I was doing to them. I called human services and asked if I could put them in foster care until I got it together. To this day I can see them waving at me in the back window, big smiles and no idea that they wouldn't see me agian for several months. I cry everytime I see it in my mind. I lived with out my children for 1 1/2 years. I took parenting classes while they were away. I found an apartment in a different town with a different man. I thought I could do it. I was back on my feet. within months he started beating me for protecting my children from his blows. (they were 5&6 years old). He had me living in a trailer in the woods 20 miles from town. His mother lived in a trailer next door. One day I snuck in and called my best friend and said I have had enough, come get me. He was at work at the time so I ran home and started packing. I looked out the window about and hour after I called and what do I see? I had my own convoy of friends to protect me and take me away. He came home while we were loading all the cars, boy was he mad. I finally could laugh in his face without getting hurt. Praise Jesus for my Friends. I would have died in that house.For quite a few years after leaving him I can only remember bits and pieces because I try to block it out. A few quick things are exotic dancing, escort service, drugs, rapes, among other things. My kids are troopers I must give them that. THey have a lot of issues but hearts are made of gold. (I know I did something right.)We have lost our electricity more times than I can count,they always treat it like we are camping. they say "AS long as we have each other we will make it." There have been many Christmas's there was no presents but they keep there heads up and say "Christmas is about family and Jesus not about presents." We live on very little money. My kids are struggling in life alot because of my choices and it really hurts inside. The last relationship stopped my heart twice literally. In October of 2008 I overdosed on many pills. I was zapped back twice. I was in a coma for 2 days on life support. I don't remember much, this information is from what people told me. No one likes to talk about it much but I try to as often as I can. It still haunts me sometimes. I try and remind myself that God sent me back for a reason. It is a has become an overwhelming struggle these days because just recently my roomate walked off with all the money to pay bills and I am behind 750.00 in monthly bills. I always think of my childrens optimism to lift me up when we have no food, toilet paper or other necessity's. There are many more tragic things things I could talk about but this is about survival. If you can help me and my family it would be greatly appriciated.
If you or you know someone that can help me write and publish my life story let me know or tell them about my life. You have to ask yourself " Do I want to know more?" I would love to tell my life story to schools, parenting groups, churches, anywhere I can make a difference. Some of my life experiences that I can talk about are
Teen Pregnancy
Running away from home
Physical abuse
Losing my chilren
Homelessness
Prostitution
Suicide
Mental illness
Adoption
Cutter/Self Harm
Sexual addiction
Poverty
HOW WE SURVIVED
If I can help one person with the selling of my life, I will have saved a soul and I will be on the road to doing what GOD kept me here for.
YES, this is really my life, I couldn't make this up. I carry the scars on my body, heart and mind but they make me who I am and they remind me "I AM A SURVIVIOR!"
I thought this was just another one of those winie pages that people come to try to get stuff for free becouse they are to lazy to go out and get a job... I was wrong... There are alot of people here that are truly trying to point you in the right direction to find help and so you can help yourself...
I need partials , most likely false teeth. I have terrible pain. 2yrs ago finally , I have disibility. The goverment seems to push the elderly and disabled right in to there graves. 
